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Silencing the Inner Critic: Harnessing Conversational Intelligence®️ for Self-Empowerment

Two women talking with their thoughts as balloons above their heads


For many high-achieving women, the most critical voice encountered daily isn't from a demanding boss or a skeptical colleague—it's the one echoing within their own minds. This inner critic can be relentless, often holding them back from their full potential.

However, by applying the principles of Conversational Intelligence®️, the pioneering framework developed by Judith E. Glaser, women can learn to reshape this internal dialogue, transforming the inner critic into a supportive inner coach.

Harnessing Inner Conversational Intelligence®️:

Recognize the Levels of Self-Dialogue

Just as Glaser identified three levels of conversational engagement with others, we can categorize the conversations we have with ourselves:

  1. Level I - Confirming our doubts and fears.

  2. Level II - Defending our self-worth against our inner critic.

  3. Level III - Discovering our inner strengths and potential.

Level III conversations with ourselves are pivotal moments in our personal growth journey. These transformative dialogues propel us past the realm of self-doubt, guiding us towards profound self-discovery. By reframing criticism into a lens of curiosity, we unlock a deeper understanding of our true capabilities and potential.

Implementing the LAPS Framework Internally involves a series of steps focused on enhancing self-awareness and positive self-talk. 

1. Listen to Connect with Yourself: Take a moment to observe your self-talk patterns. Are you overly critical of yourself? Cultivate the ability to listen to your inner voice with empathy and understanding, allowing for a more compassionate dialogue with yourself.

2. Ask Yourself Thought-Provoking Questions: Challenge your inner critic by posing questions that encourage introspection and self-reflection rather than fostering self-judgment. This approach can help shift your perspective towards growth and self-improvement.

3. Prime Your Mind for Positivity: Begin your internal conversations on a positive note by recalling past achievements and successes. This practice can help you establish a more optimistic and empowering mindset, laying the foundation for constructive self-talk.

4. Consistently Engage in Positive Self-Dialogue: Cultivate a habit of practicing positive self-talk regularly. The more you immerse yourself in affirming and encouraging internal dialogue, the more ingrained it will become in your daily thoughts and interactions with yourself.

Strategies for Reshaping the Relationship with Your Inner Critic:

1. Acknowledge Your Inner Critic Without Self-Identification

Begin by understanding that the inner critic, though a part of your thoughts, does not encompass your entire being. By recognizing its existence and influence, you can detach yourself from its negative impact, allowing you to separate your self-worth from its criticisms. This process of acknowledgment and detachment can lead to a healthier relationship with your inner voice and a stronger sense of self-awareness.

2. Cultivate Self-Compassion

Embracing self-compassion is fundamental to nurturing conversational intelligence within oneself. It involves extending the same level of kindness, empathy, and understanding towards yourself that you would readily offer to a cherished friend. This practice not only fosters a positive and supportive inner dialogue but also enhances emotional well-being and resilience.

3. Reframe the Narrative

When facing the inner critic, rather than silencing it completely, consider reframing its messages for a more positive impact. Transform statements like "You can't do this" into empowering questions such as "What valuable lessons can I extract from this challenge to grow and overcome obstacles?" This shift in perspective encourages self-reflection and personal growth, fostering a mindset geared towards continuous improvement and resilience.

4. Envision the Inner Mentor

Imagine you have an inner mentor residing within you, a wise presence always ready to offer supportive guidance and valuable insights. Whenever your inner critic starts to chime in with doubts or negativity, pause and consider what your inner mentor - the voice of encouragement and wisdom - would advise you to do in that moment. By tuning in to this imaginary mentor and seeking their perspective, you can navigate challenges with a newfound sense of clarity and self-assurance.

5. Practice Mindfulness

Engaging in mindfulness involves the practice of observing your thoughts without becoming entangled in them. This approach serves as a valuable tool for enhancing conversational intelligence with yourself, allowing for a deeper understanding of your inner dialogue and emotions. By cultivating mindfulness, individuals can develop greater self-awareness and emotional regulation, leading to improved overall well-being and mental clarity.

6. Celebrate Your Wins

Take time to acknowledge and celebrate your accomplishments, no matter how big or small. Reflect on your achievements regularly, whether it's completing a project, reaching a personal goal, or overcoming a challenge. This practice not only boosts your morale but also helps quiet the self-critical voice within you, allowing your inner cheerleader to shine brighter. Embrace the power of positive reinforcement and let your successes fuel your motivation to keep progressing towards your goals.


Conversational Intelligence®️ is not limited to interactions with others; it's equally vital in the conversations we have with ourselves. By applying its principles, high-achieving women can transform their inner dialogue from critical to constructive, paving the way for greater self-confidence, resilience, and success. The relationship with yourself sets the tone for every other relationship in your life. It's time to reshape that conversation into one that uplifts, supports, and propels you forward.

Workshop Invitation

Join us for an insightful exploration into the world of Conversational Intelligence®️ that goes beyond the surface of everyday communication.

🗓️ Mark your calendar for 29 February 2024 (from 12h00-13h15 CET) as Global Wo.Men Hub hosts a compelling workshop designed to enrich your understanding and application of conversational intelligence in every aspect of your life. This session isn't just theory; it's a hands-on experience where you will actively engage with and practice the elements of Conversational Intelligence®️.

Whether you're looking to improve your professional relationships, enhance your leadership skills, or simply become more effective in your day-to-day interactions, this workshop is for you. You'll learn to navigate conversations strategically, fostering stronger connections and achieving more meaningful outcomes.

🔗 Secure Your Spot: Don't miss out on this chance to transform the way you communicate. Register via this link.

We're excited to offer you this opportunity to join a community of like-minded individuals all striving to elevate their conversational skills. See you there for a truly interactive and enlightening experience!


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